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Today could very well have been the last day of my life. It was left to destiny and i guess i was sparred. Even thought destiny spares us every moment, and very possibly at any moment, at a whim of destiny we could be dead, it seemed like destiny actually made a choice for me to live on. My life depended on whether a certain thought would come to my mind or not and as you all can see it did.
The therapeutic value of lying in open air surrounding and looking at the beautiful night sky is known by anyone who has tried it at 2 in the morning after an all nighter. And some like me would get a chance to realise how bad it could go, depending on the place you choose. In the process of throughly enjoying the moments lying down in open air and looking at the sky and thinking silly, one could as well slowly slip into a peaceful sleep, get up in the morning and say "wow!!! that was an awesome sleep", If only it were some terrace of building, where you were going to sleep. I happened to choose the thick parapet wall opposite to my room located on the first floor of my hostel, which was sufficiently safe and stable for me to lie down on as long as i was conscious. Its not like I didn't already know the dangers of just lying down or even sitting on a parapet wall of first floor but like usual i didn't give a damn about it and it was safe as long as i remained conscious which very foolishly I manage to convince myself of, and also there was a sloppy ledge for the directing rain water to flow. Of course i had no plans sleeping there and neither did i realise that i could simply slip into sleep. Initially there was a debate going on in my mind about the concern of safety and enjoying this moment. The debate went into background and I began to daydream about different stuffs, slowly slipping into sleep in the process. And then one of my friend then interrupted all these, by an untimely visit to his room which happened to be next to mine and that broke my daydream which could very well have converted into a night one:). I happened to realise how sleepy and anybody with sound mind would panic at the adversity of the situation, which i did. Further I looked down, convinced myself how dangerous it could end up, just to make sure I move my butt and get back to my room. But the inertia of sleep had already got better of my reasoning and i was willing to spend some more time, convinced myself that a bit more was OK, I'd be careful and I'd go back to room soon and sleep properly.
At this point I began to think about this very habit of procrastination, I realised how I'd even procrastinate even if meant escalating the probability of a fatal fall to a significant extent. Thanks to this thought all my sleepiness slowly started disappearing with my analysis taking over. Soon I was stable, could balance myself properly without being extra careful.
I could just have daydreamed more and slipped into deep sleep, but now the box was open, people could know the whether the cat's dead or alive. My life could very well have been like that of a cat left in a closed box with a poisonous substance, would the cat eat it and die, or remain alive no one could tell.... The closed box still thrills me though:).....
We all have a garden of heart in us. They need nourishment; good soil, watering and a good up keep...There are also wild gardens which are sometimes even more beautiful than the very well kept garden. We are all the keepers of our own garden...
The thoughts are the soil on which the plants of our virtue, principles and values grow. Actions are the fragrances the garden emits and the sight of the garden is the way we carry ourselves.
Sometimes we see the garden of others and desire them. One must put a "do not touch" board to keep our gardens safe and beautiful sometimes. The garden of others is however only to be seen and admired at, garden we cultivate are for beautifying and sharing it with others. Sometime we tend to forget this and in the process of desiring someone else’s garden neglect our own unique garden. one can find a great pleasure in achieving what the neighbors garden has, but the satisfaction is best when we cultivate our own....Put our heart into it, protect it and cherish...
Labels: Thoughts and Realisations
I've always found that people who do something which I think is very tough, very noble or think anything about seem to do it thinking nothing about it....
I want to know how to attain that state when and rid myself of the judgments.
Thinking and trying to convince yourself that something needs to be done or that you have to put a lot of effort in doing it makes tougher. Doubts,fear, random emotions related to it makes it tougher, makes me think its either too tough or too easy. The things I do without any judgments are very easy to do and they often the things others think you are so good, but on the other hand you somehow find it obvious...
Embrace your current feelings but know that its completely due to your impressions and memory not intuition... intuition strikes in non judgmental state of mind.
For example while writing this post a lot of things went around my mind. My mind was trying to convince me that the this activity is more worthy than any other work I would've done instead. There were many decisions I had to take regarding the choice of words and the flow, a lot of distractions too. I kept getting stuck at the decisions I had to make. I wasn't writing it according to the flow of my heart, it was according to the flow of my desires rather. I wanted this post to go in a certain way. The intelligent way would be accept that my first draft may not be the best, not to get stuck at decisions, do it in minimum time as possible, later when your mind is not clogged re-read and make corrections. You give different time to the flow and corrections, you don't get stuck in doing them at the same time and Writing then became easy..When I began writing blog my posts were long and cluttered, I used to get fed up by the time I finished writing... Hope I can apply it to other activities too especially studying...
I want to know how to attain that state when and rid myself of the judgments.
Thinking and trying to convince yourself that something needs to be done or that you have to put a lot of effort in doing it makes tougher. Doubts,fear, random emotions related to it makes it tougher, makes me think its either too tough or too easy. The things I do without any judgments are very easy to do and they often the things others think you are so good, but on the other hand you somehow find it obvious...
Embrace your current feelings but know that its completely due to your impressions and memory not intuition... intuition strikes in non judgmental state of mind.
For example while writing this post a lot of things went around my mind. My mind was trying to convince me that the this activity is more worthy than any other work I would've done instead. There were many decisions I had to take regarding the choice of words and the flow, a lot of distractions too. I kept getting stuck at the decisions I had to make. I wasn't writing it according to the flow of my heart, it was according to the flow of my desires rather. I wanted this post to go in a certain way. The intelligent way would be accept that my first draft may not be the best, not to get stuck at decisions, do it in minimum time as possible, later when your mind is not clogged re-read and make corrections. You give different time to the flow and corrections, you don't get stuck in doing them at the same time and Writing then became easy..When I began writing blog my posts were long and cluttered, I used to get fed up by the time I finished writing... Hope I can apply it to other activities too especially studying...
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